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You used to give me so much shit for trying to be uplifting. You exorcised the witch out of me a long time ago. You claimed any personal magic and "whimsy" was erroneous and unnecessary if one wasn't posting the truth. I stayed loyal, cleaned up my act, my mind, my intentions, became celibate, seeked purity, seeked peace, started healing, even got married recently out of virtue. I wouldn't even have met my husband if it weren't for YOU, when I started posting my thoughts online without fear and a newfound confidence.
You then disappeared, I moved three times in the last three years for my husband, who would have taken the JAB if it weren't for me advising against it. When I met him he was a left-leaning socialist Bernie bro, and now he is a right-leaning libertarian, or centrist at best.
It hasn't been easy. Nothing is perfect. My husband has been physically and emotionally abusive toward me more than once. I have forgiven him and try to move on but the first time it happened made me realize he did not actually truly love me, but we were fighting for an ideal. This man is not my soul-mate or twin flame or perfect match. We are just people who had sex on the first date, had matching future plans, and survived through a year of long-distance relationship.
We live in a house we are renting overlooking a beautiful view of the countryside in southern Utah. Nothing much to do here but bear the heat. We aren't very inspired by each other nor desire each other. He is not mentally/intellectually stimulating enough for me and I am not physically and pragmatically skilled enough for him. We don't nearly have enough sex as much as he needs. Personally, I would rather be without and stay on my celibate and purity train, unless prompted by someone that truly desires and loves me.
Domestic life has been rocky and it's a shame considering the beautiful scenery we are surrounded by almost constantly. He now claims unhappiness and does not know what to do with me or about me. I know my value and worth and want to heal and move FORWARD. I can entertain myself and be alone.
to be continued..
You then disappeared, I moved three times in the last three years for my husband, who would have taken the JAB if it weren't for me advising against it. When I met him he was a left-leaning socialist Bernie bro, and now he is a right-leaning libertarian, or centrist at best.
It hasn't been easy. Nothing is perfect. My husband has been physically and emotionally abusive toward me more than once. I have forgiven him and try to move on but the first time it happened made me realize he did not actually truly love me, but we were fighting for an ideal. This man is not my soul-mate or twin flame or perfect match. We are just people who had sex on the first date, had matching future plans, and survived through a year of long-distance relationship.
We live in a house we are renting overlooking a beautiful view of the countryside in southern Utah. Nothing much to do here but bear the heat. We aren't very inspired by each other nor desire each other. He is not mentally/intellectually stimulating enough for me and I am not physically and pragmatically skilled enough for him. We don't nearly have enough sex as much as he needs. Personally, I would rather be without and stay on my celibate and purity train, unless prompted by someone that truly desires and loves me.
Domestic life has been rocky and it's a shame considering the beautiful scenery we are surrounded by almost constantly. He now claims unhappiness and does not know what to do with me or about me. I know my value and worth and want to heal and move FORWARD. I can entertain myself and be alone.
to be continued..
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